A Wonderful Day!!

I have had some rough days lately, but I still try to push through and enjoy my life as much as possible. Wednesday, April 10th was the Doll and my 8th Anniversary. It was an exhausting but wonderful Anniversary for the Doll and me. Lunch at Whole Foods, dinner at Connor Concepts with convertible time in between on a brilliant, warm day. We ended our day on the screen porch with our mini-fire pit and enjoying our time together. We plan to enjoy as much life together as we can. A very happy day!

It was a real struggle because along with the exhaustion and pain, my usually situational vertigo reared its ugly head. The first thing that I felt when I got out of bed was my head was spinning and it didn’t ease up much until late afternoon. But luckily the Doll loves to be my chauffeur, especially when she is driving the convertible.

By the time it came to go out to dinner, I felt like driving again and I did fine until I got out the car at the restaurant. When I turned my head, I got dizzy again. We really enjoyed a wonderful meal and the Doll drove us home.

We ended the day on the screen porch with our mini fire pit and expressed our blessings to each other. It is wonderful to have a mate who understands the journey I am on. She is still on hers as well.

This post is a short one, but I think it is important to share with everyone. My days run from rough to very rough, but I am always looking for those snippets of joy and happiness. I may have a serious cancer, but I will not allow it to control my every thought and rob me of my joy.

I return for the MRI Scan on May 15 and see the Oncologist on May 17 to discuss results and next steps. The hope is that the Lenvima, in addition to my complimentary alternative treatments, will slow the cancer down. If not, then we must look at next steps.

I will close by saying again that all your support and love have helped me keep a positive attitude and have increased my hope for more trips around the sun. I also want to declare that my lovely wife is awesome, and I love her to the edge of the Universe, and beyond, and I know she feels the same about me!.

Love, Jim

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Put on A Happy Face

“Jim Johnson is a positive minded person. A person who knows the glass is always full no matter how much water or air is in the glass. It has been said that he has always been positive, even when he was a kid. There is confirmation from other human beings that this viewpoint is true.

It is kind of ironic that many years ago some of his co-workers at TVA called him “Blue Sky” because of his cheerful attitude. One could assume they were wanting to be somewhat derogatory since many of them were pessimists and grumblers. I bet they were somewhat annoyed when Jim wore his “Blue Sky” badge and reveled in its truthful meaning for him!”

I can tell you that I still have a positive attitude even in the worst of times. The last two weeks, and especially the last week, I have been sicker that any time in my life other that when I had the flu so bad that I had to be bedridden for four days. The side effects that I mentioned in my previous post have increased plus the onset of a sinus infection have weakened me and almost caused me to be homebound.

To make matters worse, the antibiotic that I was prescribed gave me serious diarrhea after a couple of days. That weakened me even more and I don’t know when I have felt worse. I stopped the antibiotic and the diarrhea has finally stopped.

It has been a very rough week for me. I missed another Toastmasters meeting and I struggled with moderating the ETMP Meeting on Tuesday. I asked the questions for the panelists and had to sit several times between questions due to leg pains.

I go to the Oncologist on Wednesday for bloodwork and a check-in so hopefully we can discuss some options to help with the side effects. I sure hope for the slightest of relief.

Let’s turn that frown upside down! Despite this miserable situation I find myself in. I am still searching and finding joy in all parts of my life A slice of joy occasionally makes life worth living. Even when I take pics and selfies, I try to put a big smile on while obscuring my physical and emotional aliments. Can you say, “Fake it till you make it?”

Some of my recent joys include:

  • Spending quality time with my Doll holding hands, hugging, and comforting each other while gazing into each other’s eyes What a powerful soul connection. It always gives me goose bumps.
  • Enjoying the beautiful sound of the wind chimes and the birds while sitting on the screen porch with a coffee. A little bit of paradise and it will be enjoyed more as the temperature rises. It will be a great place to rest and reflect. It is the Doll’s favorite getaway too so that means even more time together.
  • Seeing posts of my granddaughters Rose and Lily enjoying their lives and activities. The are fabulous little ladies and so talented. They have very bright futures.
  • Keeping up with my son, Tony, who continues to be consumed with music and keeping those beer steins full. He really seems to be more settled than ever and continues being a great Dad for Rose. I m proud of my son!
  • Reading about my daughter, Brianne’s, accomplishments. Whether she has written a new book, or on TV for an interview, or off to receive another prestigious award from the various Associations for the Archives. She is at the top of her game and it makes my heart swell with pride to have her as my daughter. She is an awesome Mom to Lily too.
  • Riding in the convertible on a sunny warm day. More and more the Doll is the chauffeur, but whether driving or riding it is wonderful to feel the wind in your hair and the sun on your skin!
  • Having people respond to my Facebook posts with such nice thoughts like “you look great” or “beautiful couple” People lift me up!
  • Seeing so many posts of beautiful children or grandchildren of my Facebook friends. There is nothing more precious than a child.
  • Reminiscing about what Teresa and I did with Tony and Brianne when they were younger. When I visualize those memories, it warms my heart and invokes tremendous emotion.
  • Watching Blue Planet or Planet Earth episodes with my current nuclear family of Shelia, Haylee, and Ivan. We are a family and it reminds me of what family is all about. We do lots of family things and it seems normal now. I hope we can do more as time goes on. We have a lot of love right here!
  • Attending a Toastmasters or ETMP meeting when able and discussing anything other than cancer. Cancer cannot be the Boss of me!
  • Attending the Support Group on Tuesday evenings at the Cancer Support Community. It’s a place where I can listen or share from so many wonderful people who have one thing in common – cancer! I have only been a member for a few months, but I feel so good about these folks. They inspire me in some way every meeting and I am so appreciative of them. I belong.
  • Reading wonderful motivational posts from my friend All Goggins. He comes up with outstanding ways to lift me up spiritually.
  • Keeping up with my friend from New York, Kenny Martone, who is battling the same cancer as me and whose has been valiant and fearless in his journey despite horrendous treatments and side effects. He is a very brave young man with a fantastic attitude!
  • Spying fresh flowers and plants coming out for spring and just being dazzled by their beauty.
  • Being out on the back deck and letting the warm sun soak in and enjoying the blue sky. It can’t help but to settle you down and appreciate the wonderful world in which we live.

Obviously, I could list so many more areas where I find tremendous joy in everyday life. When you have cancer with an undetermined outcome it is imperative to find those sparkles anywhere and everywhere possible. Two things happen when you do that. One is that your mind focuses on the beauty and wonder in front of you. And two, you have less time to focus on the cancer and its impact on you. It is not always easy to focus on the right things, but it is necessary to try.

My friends, I want to say that along my journey so far it has been a tremendous feeling to know the love and support that you all have given me. I do not know where my journey will take me or when it will end but I do know I will have your unwavering love all the way and I thank you so much for that. As humans there is nothing more powerful than our connections!

Love, Jim

It Isn’t in My Blood

Help me, it’s like the walls are caving in

Sometimes I feel like giving up

But I just can’t

It isn’t in my blood

Or is it?

I wake up cold and hurting. As I open my eyes, I can tell it is very dark and wet and as I  gaze in the distance, I see brilliant lightning and hear and feel violent thunder. I look at my feet and I am in a life raft in the ocean with the water spilling over the sides into the raft keeping me chilled to the bone. The storm threatens to take what is left of my life. I am alone here.

This is a recurring scene that that happens in my mind every day and sometimes multiple times per day. I believe this is the manifestation of the side effects of my medication or as result of the cancer, perhaps both.  No matter the reason, I am having a difficult time finding any energy to do much and quite frankly, I am having difficulty finding joy in the normal things that I usually find joyful.

It is obvious I am depressed. I don’t feel like myself. You know the guy who never gives up and fights hard all the time? You know, Jim Johnson?

Here are the side effects I am experiencing with Lenvima (In order of observed severity) Started 2-14-19

  • Tiredness/Weakness (Overwhelming)
  • Leg pain and difficulty walking especially on first standing from a sitting position
  • Headaches & Flu like Muscle and joint pain (No Fever)
  • Hoarseness and Sore Throat
  • Muscle Cramps and Muscle stiffness & Weakness in legs
  • Tingling/Numbness in feet
  • Nose bleeds (Once or twice)
  • Pain/Discomfort Right Abdomen
  • Coughing (Occasionally)
  • Heartburn (Once or twice)

It has been a struggle!

I know that in addition to these side effects destroying my happy place the depression is trying to creep in. I won an area speech contest a couple of weeks ago in Toastmasters and was scheduled for the next round this past Saturday. I absolutely could not muster the energy and willpower to show up. If you know how much I love Toastmasters and competing, then you know it must be serious

When the life raft scenario come into my mind, I play out several scenarios. One is that I try to ride out the storm by hanging on for dear life. Another one is to wait for help that I have no way of knowing if it’s coming. And as much as I hate to admit, dear readers, one is just to move to one side and allow the sea water to sink the life raft and take away all my pain and suffering.

Please don’t panic. This doesn’t mean I have given up hope, but it is important to compare quality of life versus quantity of life. With cancer and cancer treatments you never know what you will get and if it is putting a damper on my quality of life, it will continue to be a burden that I need to carry. Cancer is mean, Cancer is insidious, and cancer is a monster. I know I have said that having cancer is a gift in that you have time to finish important work. But sometimes the gift’s luster is a little less bright.

I hope to pull out of this funk soon and continue to write the blog posts that are important to write. I think it is very important to say to you all that your love and support has made and continues to make a huge difference for me.

Love Jim

I Didn’t See That Coming!!

In my last post I promised to update everyone on my medication status. As you could probably tell I was quite frustrated when I didn’t get my Pharmacy Card on the Friday, which would have been February 8, a full week after my initial approval. I had planned to call back on Monday morning, February 11 to inquire.

But before I could do that, I got a call from the drug manufacturer, Eisai, a Japanese drug company. They had received information from my oncologist that is prescribing the medication and was doing a follow-up to see if I could afford the co-pays. I mentioned that I was applying through the HealthWell Foundation but had not received full approval yet.

At that point they indicated that if I was within the income guidelines, they were offering a Zero copay assistance that would cover me for the rest of 2019. Almost $ 30, 000 of assistance! I gave them my adjusted gross income for 2018 and they asked me to submit my Social Security income and I would be approved. I immediately submitted the forms.

I did not see that coming at all! But the good news is that by delaying my approval, HealthWell did me a huge favor. Since I had not been completely approved and not received any of the $ 8,000 grant, I was able to get almost 4 times the amount!

The next day on Tuesday the pharmacist from the other specialty pharmacy called to discuss everything about Lenvima. We discussed the side effects, proper dosage, how to take the capsules and what to look out for. When we completed that part, she told me that my medication was approved, and it would go out for next day delivery on Wednesday. The medicine was delivered the next day as promised but since it was late in the day, I decided to wait till the next morning to start just in case side effects would be serious enough to seek medical assistance.

I have now been on the medication since Valentines day, approximately 2 weeks. Like any Cancer Medication it has side effects. I haven’t had any of the serious or some of the most common side effects. However, a couple of the side effects I have experienced have impacted me. The two big ones are the overall tiredness and fatigue. I thought I was fatigued before but now it is just an overall tiredness that starts every morning and lasts until I collapse at night. An occasional nap seems to help.

The other side effect is the overall muscle aches that mimic the flu but no increased temperature. Leg and foot cramps have increased as well. With the fatigue and tiredness, I have mobility problems and when I move, I waddle more than walk. I still have some unsteadiness but have not fallen. But I certainly have the old man slow movement thing going on. This is all new to me since I tend to move faster than most.

I have also been experiencing sinus drainage and headaches, sore throat, light nosebleeds, and hoarseness. These could be side effects since they are listed but it could also be a sinus infection. I am seeing the ENT doctor on Friday to be assessed. I also see my oncologist on March 7, and I will have discussions with him about my treatments.

At this point, I have overcome some hurdles getting my medicine and I can accept the side effects at this point, especially if the medicine is helping slow my tumors. I am continuing to push with my Toastmasters activities and my East Tennessee Meeting Professional group. The only thing I am slacking on is my writing. Other than the Blog I am only writing when I go to my writing class once per month. I need to write more, not less.

I will close by saying that I don’t know how many more trips around the sun that I have or even how many rotations of the earth on its axis, but what I do know is that every day that I am here I plan to be the best person I can be and enjoy family and friends. I know that all those days won’t be perfect but that’s okay. Whether you have cancer or not, no day is perfect. And as my lovely wife reminds me, I am not perfect either. LOL

However, each day is an opportunity to be with the important people in my life. And for that I am extremely grateful. And I continue to appreciate all of the love and support from all of you! Love, Jim

Still in Limbo, Jimbo

As I reported last post, I was waiting on my Pet Scan results and waiting to see if I could obtain some funding for my very expensive co-pay for the Lenvima.

I did get the results from the PET scan and they were good considering the circumstances. The PET didn’t light up for cancer except for the original tumor and the two additional tumors.  The cancer was growing and spreading but still in my liver. A lymph gland showed it was swollen and the advice was to watch it for future scans. The oncologist office said it was probably due to all the activity in that area and it was enlarged due to the lymph system trying to drain the waste. Yuck!

So now to the short but already frustrating saga of obtaining help with the co-pay. I was told that the Oncology department would be coordinating that for me, but I didn’t understand the process until I got a call from the Specialty Pharmacy in Orlando to let me know they have received the approval from my Medicare Part D provider and subsequent prescription to fill.

At that time, they confirmed that the co-pays for me would be about $ 2600 per month. I asked them about the co-pay assistance, and they transferred me to someone who got some intake information. That was on a Friday afternoon on February 1. I was only able to take a few notes and give them income information and was told that I should receive a packet of information on the following Monday. I asked if it could be expedited and they said they would put that in the notes

I waited until mid-morning on Monday and since I had not heard from anyone, I called the Pharmacy back. I found out that the co-pay help was with the Health Well Foundation in Maryland. I looked them up on their website and called them to see what I could do to expedite the process. I found out that in fact I needed to go to the website and download Income Verification Forms and fax them in.

At that point I was preapproved based on the demographic information I had provided before. But in order to get full approval and a pharmacy card to pay the co-pays and order my medication the grant funding team would have to review a lot of information.

I downloaded the forms and sent the income tax information in that evening. When I looked back over the form again it was clear that they needed not only the 1040 form but also the W2’s and 1099’s to support that for 2017. It did seem to be redundant. But I did find out that if approved I would get $ 8000 that would at least cover the first 3 months.

The next day I received a call telling me that I needed to send them a copy of my original 1040 for 2017. The one I sent was an amended return and was more accurate and wouldn’t change the income at all. But rules are rules.

It took about three days to finally get everything in and to the grant folks for final review. I looked up the income guidelines and I fall in the amount that should be approved. I called back on Thursday and Friday and was told that if the approval happens it will show up on the patient portal. As soon as that happens, I can contact the specialty pharmacy and they can access the portal as well and consummate my prescription order.

I checked back with the specialty pharmacy and they confirmed the process and even told me that they would ship the Lenvima for next day delivery. You can imagine my frustration that the approval didn’t come on Friday and neither the Foundation or the Specialty drug company are open weekends. I surely hope I get approval tomorrow so I can get started.

This process is a reminder that even when you are proactive in your treatments, it just takes time. After all I am not the only person going through this and treatments, scan, blood tests, and even approval for co-pays take time.  I still haven’t learned the patience I so desperately need this lifetime.

Of course, there is no guarantee that the drug will work or even that I can tolerate it. It can have some serious side effects. And even though I am thrilled that it looks like I will receive some much need financial help, I am a bit nervous in that I haven’t had any treatment since the last Y90 on November 13, almost 3 months ago and the last treatment wasn’t effective. It has been almost 3 weeks since I saw my oncologist. So, any delay in a treatment is giving the Monster more energy and more opportunity to spread outside the liver.

Currently, I am still experiencing a varying amount of fatigue. Some days are better than others, but no days anymore are energetic. I continue to try and live my life the best I can and try to fit the important things in first. My dilemma is there are so many important things.

In my next post I will report on the status of my medication, but I also want to really discuss the difference in being a cancer patient caregiver and having cancer yourself. That will require me to be as honest as I can be and require me to be vulnerable.

I will close now by thanking all my family and friends for the incredible love and compassion they have shown. It is wonderful to have so many people sending energy and praying for me. I am blessed!

Love Jim

I Read the Scan today, Oh Boy

In my last blog I talked about the big scan day. I had the BIG scan on 1-14-19 and I went and got the disc and written conclusions the next day even though I wouldn’t see my oncologist until 1-23-19. Just as implied in the Beatles song, the news wasn’t good.

As you may remember I had two Y90 procedures. The first one was effective in that it encapsulated one side of the tumor. That means that one side has crusted over and was not growing. A partial response you might say. The other side didn’t respond and has grown. In addition, there are two smaller lesions (tumors) on that same lobe. This is an indication that the tumor is actively growing and spreading.

This means the hope of surgery and a possible cure is not going to happen. It also means that from this point on the goal will be trying to halt the progression and extend my life. It is important that I wrap my head around the fact that I will not have a cure. I don’t like it, but it was a longshot at best. The only cure will come when I transition to my spirit world. I hope that is a while.

In discussions with my oncologists we discussed the results and what they meant for me. One of the first questions I asked was what I could expect if we did nothing. He responded that I will most likely have 4-6 months to live. I responded by saying “Then by all means let’s do something!”

The something that we decided was that I would start a chemotherapy regiment that is in the form of a daily pill called Lenvima. A relatively new drug approved as a first line agent for HCC liver cancer in late 2018. Here is the link:

http://www.lenvima.com/advanced-kidney-cancer?utm_source=bing&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=Brand&utm_term=lenvima%20approval&utm_content=Information&gclid=

It does have some common and some rare side effects. I am not thrilled about it because I know what chemo does to the body. However, if I can tolerate it well it has the potential to slow down the progress of the monster growing in my liver.

I also discussed the use of active hexose correlated compound that my integrative medical doctor had shared with and suggested a dosage. It has shown to extend the lives of patients with my type of cancer. My Oncologist agreed it was ok to use with my other treatment. See below.

AHCC Liver Cancer Research #1: Clinical Study, Results.

Source:
Thammasat University Rangsit Campus, Patumthani, Thailand.

Topic:
Prognostic improvement of patients with advanced liver cancer after AHCC treatment

Abstract:
A prospective cohort study was performed with 44 patients with histologically confirmed liver cancer. Survival time, quality of life, clinical and immunological parameters related to liver function, cellular immunity, and patient status were determined. Of the 44 patients, 34 and 10 received AHCC and placebo (control) orally, respectively.

Results / Conclusion:

  • Patients in the AHCC treated-group had a significantly prolonged survival when compared to the control group.
  • After 3 months of AHCC treatment, patients showed significantly improved quality of life in terms of mental stability, general physical health status, and ability to have normal activities.
  • This study suggests that AHCC intake could prolong the survival and improve the prognosis of patients with advanced liver cancer and delay the gradual decline of their physiological status.

So, with these two agents, my whole food plant-based diet, and my spiritual exercises I feel like I can extend my life. At this point I would not hazard any guess of the outcomes. So, the hope is that everything helps but every patient is different so the response may be different.

Of course, the concern is that the cancer may have spread outside my liver. Even if it has, the treatment will be the same. When I mentioned to my oncologist that I was having dizzy spells that I attributed to vertigo he suggested a brain scan to make sure my brain isn’t involved.

He also wanted to do a PET scan which will show where cancer is in my body below the head. It will light up anywhere there is cancer. That would include the cancer I know about and anywhere it may have spread. (I am hoping not) That will also give us a baseline so when we go back and scan in about 3 months we can tell if anything is working and whether to continue or move to a second line agent. It will take about 7-10 days to receive the medication.

And Oh, by the way, I have Medicare Part D coverage and the total cost of the drug is about $215,000.00 per year. That’s right!! My plan pays $15,390.59 per month and I am responsible for $2410.58 per month! However there appears to be some financial aid and possibly the drug company giving discounts. I sure hope we don’t have to sell the house and two of our 3 vehicles. If we sold all of them, I would have to take UBER everywhere.

I had my MRI brain scan last Thursday. I hate those loud and intrusive MRI sounds! The next day I got a call from the Oncologist that my brain scan was normal, which meant no cancer. A nice piece of news! I tried to get them to say that brain was SUPERIOR, but they wouldn’t budge. I will accept that, LOL.

My PET scan is scheduled for next Wednesday so we will know the extent of any spread at that time and I will post the results.

I think that is all the news I have right now. I am still trying to keep a positive attitude and rest when I can. Part of keeping that positive attitude is just knowing how many of you, my great family and friends, pray or send positive vibrations my way. I know I feel the love of all of you and if you are reading this, you have, and continue to, impact my life.

The picture on todays post is sort of special. It is a Peace Lily in bloom that I have had almost 9 years and it is from Teresa’s Celebration of Life. Of course, it had plenty of blooms when I first brought it home, but the blooms went away.

Since then it has bloomed a total of 3 times with a single bloom each time. The first one was in October 2014 on the exact same day as Shelia got custody of her two Grandchildren. The second time was exactly one year later. Both perhaps were signs of good things.

It bloomed again about 2 weeks ago, so I was hoping it was a sign that my tumor was stable. It was not to be. Two out of three I suppose. But perhaps it is a sign that I need peace.

Love, Jim

 

 

The BIG SCAN 1-14-19

When you have cancer, scans and tests of all types are performed. The results of the various scans can be pretty good, or bad. The original CT scan back on July 31 was not good because it showed a mass in the middle of my liver. A follow-up MRI confirmed the mass and that wasn’t good. I even had an endoscopy of my esophagus to rule out a problem in my digestive tract. The result of that test was good.

I saw many doctors, residents, and interns while in the hospital those four days. Many of them said that the tumor didn’t appear as cancer. Then of course came the biopsy. I wouldn’t know it for about a week that the result of the biopsy was not good. In fact, it was really bad. Hepatocellular Carcinoma (Primary Liver Cancer).

That whole week prior to the meeting with Dr. Gray I had hopes that the tumor was benign, but the truth is I was not surprised at all when he told me the news. I just looked my beautiful wife in the eyes and we both knew it was another attack by the Monster. Not our First Rodeo.

I seldom, if at all, panic or show a lot of emotion during these conversations with the doctors whether it is about me or a loved one. I sort of let things go in and I appear calm. I was calm, or maybe just a bit numb. No one ever looks forward to hearing the words “You have Cancer.” Of course, there are many types of Cancer and, of course, some Cancers are treatable and beatable.

It seems that all the Cancers around me have been very serious and deadly. Even Shelia’s breast cancer was Stage 3C because of the number of lymph nodes involved. She is working hard to beat it, but the likelihood of recurrence is higher than many.

If there was any good news at all during that period was that although my tumor was too large to resect, it didn’t appear to have spread outside the liver. Follow-up CT with contrast scan of my lungs brought good news that it hadn’t gone there. Another good result was that my Whole-Body Bone Scan was negative for tumors.

Another piece of good news of course was that after originally stating that he didn’t think surgery was an option because of active disease, Dr. Kingham of MSK called me back and said I may be a candidate for surgery if the Y90 procedures were effective. If that is the case, then great news.

That brings us to one of the most important diagnostic procedures that I have had. My treatment all will depend on whether the MRI with Contrast tomorrow morning shows the tumor has shrank or at least crusted over. If that is the case, then there is a slim chance that the surgery will cure me. That doesn’t seem likely to me, but you better believe I am hoping for the chance. The surgery will be very risky, and I won’t know if it will be an option in any case until the MRI results combined with my bloodwork and meeting with oncologist will place me in the surgery “window.”

If the results om my MRI show that the cancer has spread anywhere outside my liver, then it is really bad and automatically puts me in a Stage 4 status which is terminal cancer. There aren’t any real effective treatments for this situation. Traditional chemotherapy doesn’t do a lot to slow it down. There are some new drugs that show promise, but they also have potentially serious side effects.

Either way the result of the MRI will chart my path for the rest of my life whether it be months or years. At this point I am feeling like the surgery won’t be an option. I have been fortunate most of my life, but this seems like it won’t be in my favor. Of course, I am hoping for the best but expecting the worst. That’s really the only way for me to look at it. It seems to be a realistic approach.

Either way it goes I am prepared to battle the monster and squeeze out every bit of life I can. I still have ambitions not realized and I won’t go down easy. But I will do so with the knowledge that we all transition at the end of our lives here on earth and become the pure soul that we always are.

Whenever my transition time comes, I want to say right now that finding that I have a deadly cancer has been a gift. It has given me time to enjoy my family and friends; time to get my financial house in order; and time for me to work on calming my mind and body through mindfulness, meditation, and spiritual exercise. You never now when you are going to go, but to die suddenly without the opportunity to do what I have been able to accomplish in the last five months would be far worse. Instead it’s a gift.

My family and friends have responded with so much love and concern that it warms my heart so much. A man really doesn’t realize the impact of others on him, and his impact on others until faced with the inevitable. No matter when I transition, I only want to be remembered as a kind and generous man. I am hopeful.

I will close now with a big THANKS to all of you continue to support me through my journey. A special shout out to my long-time friend Sheryl who has sent me quite a few handcrafted cards that she makes herself. Every time I get one, I am amazed at her creativity and her caring for me enough to make them especially for me. They always make my day. The photo with this post is the most recent one she made. Thank you Dunny!

Love and peace to all,

Jim